Family Thanks
by Anonymous-Music
Summary: With the Christmas season around, how do the former Akatsuki members feel? Contains Christian themes.


"Naruto" is owned by Masashi Kishimoto.

Dedicated to my older sister, a fan of little Deidara and regular Sasori as "brothers".

The key used by wise folk that I should do: "" talking, ~~ thoughts, {} sounds and looks cool

"Guys, get your rear-ends up and dressed before I find my flagpole! I at least know where the bat is!"

The male Akatsuki former-members were heard thudding and claiming the bathroom after hearing Konan's threat.

{thud} "Move it!" ~There's Kisame~. {crack} "That was my face you just hit!" ~Definitely Sasori~. {kick} "It's made of wood; you can't flipping feel that!" ~Good, Itachi didn't swear this time~. {jump}"Merry Christmas, Onii-sans and Onee-chan!" ~Then the angel Deidara; good, they're all up and moving for food~.

After the incident involving Pein, they all decided to listen to her before being hung on the said pole by their underwear. At Christmas time. In the middle of the night. Then have that videotaped and put on the web. With pictures. None of the men thought it was worth their dignity, honor, or pride.

~Flashback~

Sasori was going down the narrow hallway for a midnight snack of "Santa's" Christmas cookies that Deidara and Konan had baked that day. Lifting his left hand to "tame" his untamable scarlet hair, he heard struggles out the window. He wished he hadn't looked.

As his eyes grew wide with horror, Sasori shouted at the top of his wooden lungs, "Holy crap, it's Pein!"

As Kisame, Itachi, Zetsu, and Deidara ran to see the sight, Sasori was laughing so hard that he needed assistance from Kisame just to get up. Itachi decided to look just a little, and was mentally scarred by Konan, who was still with her aluminum bat with specially-designed studs.

Pein had his underwear caught on the top of the pole, and was ten feet off the ground. He screamed every time Konan swung her bat at his head, maniacally laughing, making sure that he was hit with each skull-cracking swing.

"Merry Christmas, you rude…!"

After about one hour of bloodshed, the surviving guys comforted Konan's hurt feelings by making more cookies, watching movies, and sleeping in the living room. They kicked out Pein and had a wonderful Christmas/New Year without him. Konan, however, used the pole threat to keep the house in order. It's hard to be good when you've been bad for so long.

~End Flashback~

As Konan had just set up the last plate of sushi, the guys came downstairs in their new silk kimono, which were not only on their beds, bought by Konan, and came with the tabi, zori, geta, and obi, but each one was different for each male. She reminded herself to buy them hakama later, after she made more money as a scroll maker.

Itachi had a scarlet red kimono with a mangekyo-sharingan border, a black obi, and scarlet tabi. Kisame had a deep blue kimono with his Samehada as a border, white obi, and deep blue tabi. Sasori had a tan kimono with darker brown rings like a tree, an "Artistic wire border," as he called it, an evergreen obi, and deep tan tabi. Deidara had a light tan kimono with animals as the border, a golden obi, and light tan tabi.

"So, how do you like your outfits?" Konan asked.

"It's really cool, Onee-chan!" cried Deidara, hugging her with all he had.

"You didn't have to do that, you know. We can fend for ourselves. How did you get them anyway?"

"Kisame, I wanted to get you guys something really nice- you have no kimono, no hakama, and little common sense, so you do need me. I will try to get you guys hakama later," replied Konan.

"Thank you, Konan- I don't know a better kunoichi who balances four boys better than you," complimented Sasori.

"We probably should be calling you Okaa-san, since-not to be rude- you could be some of our mothers," added Itachi.

"Then it's settled, Onee-chan is now Okaa-san and is the best in the world!" declared Deidara, jumping like a rabbit on steroids.

As Kisame, Itachi, Sasori, and Deidara cheered, Konan blushed with embarrassment. She didn't think it was much, but it was the world to them. She picked up Deidara and carried him on her shoulders to the table to eat. Deidara started playing with her short, deep blue hair and put a clay lotus in where she would put the origami one.

"Dear Lord, I thank you for this day that you have given us, and for giving us a second chance at life. I thank You for our salvation in Jesus, and for giving us a family, a home, and food. Please bless this meal so that we can live out Your Word. In Jesus' name we pray, Amen."

As Deidara finished his prayer, everyone said "Amen" and took a moment to regain their composure. Konan had to use her napkin as a tissue as she reheard Deidara's prayer in all of its beauty.

"So, would you guys like to visit your friends after breakfast?" Konan asked in between her large bites of inari.

"Hai, Okaa-san!" was all she had to hear to know she was going to have a Merry Christmas.

As the table needed a refill of milk, she got up to get more for everyone when she saw the most beautiful outfit she had ever seen in her life.

A perfectly white kimono was on the counter and had origami animal borders of many prints of the seasons, an obi with little photos of everyone woven in, white tabi, and a pair of zori and geta next to a bamboo-handled umbrella with many different flowers on top. The note next to everything had a simple three word phrase, signed by everyone-

Merry Christmas, Okaa-san.

She knew it was her family thanks.


End file.
